So many reasons to be thankful

Tonight, I have been reflecting on my life, and what I take for granted every day. When I found out I was pregnant I joined a group of mommies all due in September. Sadly, some of them did not stay in the group, and my heart broke every time I read about another loss. One loss in particular stuck with me, and probably every woman in the group. This woman lost her son at 19 weeks and 3 days pregnant. I cried for her, even though I have never met her.

Today, I found out that she is expecting again! Great news, but as you can imagine, she is very cautious, and probably will not believe she is going to have a baby, until she carries him/her home in her arms. I cried again for her, this time out of joy. I pray that this baby sticks, and she gets the baby she has been dreaming of.

And, then I sit and think of my own children. My beautiful 4 year old, who can drive me insane, but who has held my heart in her hands since the day I got that positive pregnancy test. I look at my sweet baby Evalynn, who was born healthy, happy, and perfect. I am one of the lucky ones, who has never had to go through the loss of a child. I become so content with my life, and the health of my babies, that I forget to be thankful for it. So, when my 4 year old has driven me to pull my hair out, and my 2 month old is fussy, I will think of all the women who have lost a child, and I will be thankful.

A few things my girls taught me today...

1. Sitting back and enjoying the ride is the most important lesson anyone can learn. Housework, and shopping can wait, but spending time with your family/kids gives you memories to last a lifetime.

2. A sweet smile in the morning from a precious new baby is the best pick-me-up, no matter how little sleep you got the night before (due to that same baby waking every 3 hours to eat!)

3. The best way to get the wrinkles out of a 4 year-old after a too-long bath is to iron them out :P (according to my sweet daughter Kayla!)

4. There are a few essential things one needs when photographing an 8 week old baby... a high-speed camera that takes lots of pictures really quickly, in order to catch all those cute facial expressions... Patience, because babies are not the best models...an assistant to help place the baby, make her happy, and move out of the way quick enough so the photographer can capture the moment! I have a new found appreciation for baby photographers after playing photographer tonight!

Here are a couple of the pictures I took tonight of Evalynn... I think I did a pretty good job for being an amateur and working with a mediocre camera!

Sleeping for the first few photos...but then
She was not so happy about her pictures being taken
Finally got a few good ones of her awake, this is my fav!!

Fall Festivities!

I love the fall! The crisp air, leaves changing, pumpkin carving, baking, family, friends, hot chocolate, and snuggling up under a nice warm blanket. These are just some of the things I love about fall!

We went up to Murray Family Farm two weeks ago with my mom, Grandma K, to go apple picking, and get some pumpkins. We had an awesome day, filled with laughing and lots of fun!

We picked out a few pumpkins for carving, although Kayla wasn't able to get this HUGE one, we found a nice sized one for her! We shopped around in the store, and bought some fruit, before sitting down to have some lunch. After lunch, we went on a hay ride and got to pick our own little pumpkin from the pumpkin patch. We got to paint some pumpkins with funky faces, and designs, and then we picked apples to our hearts content!

The day was long, but we had a blast. We picked a total of 30 lbs of apples, which we will be canning, making apple butter, apple pies, spiced apples, apple sauce, and who knows what else! We are also planning on making a trip back to the farm in May to pick berries! I think we have found a new family tradition!

And this is what we brought home with us!

Where does the time go?

Wow, life creeps up on me and I don't keep up. I am going to attempt to stay a little more active with my blog, but no promises.

Since my last post, our little angel was born. Evalynn came into this world after a short, calm labor and delivery on September 2nd. Life has been wonderful, yet exhausting with a newborn in the house again. It is really amazing how well a woman can manage on little sleep, and the demands of a 4 year-old and an infant.

Now that we have welcomed our sweet baby into our family, and life is settling down (a little bit, at least), we have one more big event to prepare for... Chris and I are planning our wedding, actively! Yes, we have actually been "planning" since February, but it has been pretty minimal. We decided on our colors, the venue, and the ideas of what we want, but the real planning has been put off until now. But, now is the time for us to roll up our sleeves and get a little dirty.

Today was one of those jump in and get dirty days. My sister, mom and I went to the local bridal shop to find bridesmaids dresses and my mom's dress. We had a terrific day together, shopping and chatting. It was a special day because my big sister is my maid of honor, and my mom is walking me down the aisle. I was able to spend some great quality time with two of the most important women in my life, which is something that doesn't happen often enough.

These next five months are going to be hectic, overwhelming, and exhausting, but it will bring us to a very special day, the day I get to marry the love of my life. I have loved this man for a long time, and I am ready to be his wife.

20 weeks down, 20 to go!

Oh my, what is this? Two posts in one week! It's a miracle!!!!!

I had a great day today. We had our 20 week OB appointment this morning. It was really quick and painless! Even getting weighed didn't hurt a bit! So far, only 9 lbs! I am right on track, and have 20 lbs to gain (my personal goal, in line with expert recommendations). We got the results of the AFP test today... baby looks very healthy, with no deformities. Dr. M did a quick ultrasound (I love this man because he loves to show us our baby!) and the baby is doing great. Chris thought he saw "nothing" in the lower area, and said he thought we would have a beautiful baby instead of a handsome one. I told him not to look too much into it because everything has to be at the right angle to actually tell, and it was such a quick sweep over that area that he might not have seen what he thought he saw (or didn't see for that matter :P).

After our Dr.'s appointment, we headed for our anatomy scan at the hospital. The tech did all her measuring, and we got to watch while she looked at the spine, kidneys, heart, bladder, arms, hands, legs, feet, face, brain etc. She kept saying that baby has a beautiful spine, which is music to my ears! We got a really good shot of the feet (no pic though) and could count the toes and almost see the toenails! Everything looks amazing, and I am so excited that our baby is doing so well. It will be nice to hear from the Dr. on the official "results" of the scan, just to be sure that EVERYTHING is good! Mommy likes to worry sometimes!

I also found out today why I have been feeling like someone is tap dancing on my bladder! Our baby is in the breech position (head up) and his/her little feet are in the perfect position to dance on my bladder! It's amazing to see how different this pregnancy is from my first. Kayla was always in the transverse (sideways) or normal (head down) position throughout my pregnancy. I am not too worried about this one being breech right now. We have 20 weeks to get into position!

Later on, Chris and I went shopping for Kayla's birthday party. She is turning 4 on Saturday! I can't believe how fast time has gone by. My little girl is growing up so quickly, and it seems like it was not that long ago that I was feeling her kicks in my belly! She is so excited to be a big sister, and right now she wants a baby brother! It changes as frequently as her favorite color, but I am sure she will enjoy being a big sister no matter what.

Here is a pic from today of the new baby's arm and hand. There are clearly four little fingers showing us how old Kayla is going to be!

Here's pics of me at 15 weeks and 20 weeks!

I didn't think I was that big yet, but seeing the last pic makes me say "WOW!"

So, I wonder who has the time to update their blogs daily, or even weekly. It seems like life gets in the way, and a month goes by before I think about updating again!

So, where to start???? We have had a busy month with helping C's mom move, having family visit, work, school, the kid, and life in general. We got our engagement pictures done about 3 weeks ago, and we are just waiting for the final product so we can order some prints. It was a lot of fun having our pics taken. We did them at an old burnt down house, and we even had a strange dog join us! I am so anxious to see the pics because it was just fun taking them, and I think we got some good shots.

My daughter has had an ongoing rash for the past month. The Dr. thought it was an eczema outbreak, but it is becoming apparent that it is something else. She gets red splotches on her tummy and back, and gets little welts that look like bug bites. It comes and goes, so I am starting a journal to see if there is anything in common with the break outs. I feel helpless because I have no idea what is causing it, and I feel like I can't help her.

We had our 16 week appointment 4 weeks ago! This is the most recent ultrasound picture. The head is on the right side, with the spine running across the top, and the belly facing downward. I know it's hard to see, but hopefully you can make out a baby!

Baby C. is getting stronger by the day. I have been feeling flutters since about 16 weeks, and now I am feeling him/her everyday. Somedays it is a lot, and others it is only at the end of the day when I am relaxing.

Today, I felt a really strong punch/kick. It felt like the baby was trying to punch through my tummy, and it almost hurt, it was so strong! I couldn't believe it!

Thursday is our next Dr.'s appointment, and we have a big ultrasound that day as well. Everyone is convinced that I am going to give in and find out the sex, but I know C will keep me strong, and cover my eyes if he has too! I am excited to be surprised, though. I think that hearing "It's a boy" or "It's a girl" after the labor and delivery will make the day that much more special. It's like the reward for all the hard work!

We do get mixed reactions when we tell people we are waiting. Some people high five us, and say, "that's the way to do it" and others are in complete shock and say, "How are you able to do that?"It is a personal choice and for us, it seems to be pretty easy. Contrary to what most believe, I have very little desire to know if we are having a boy or girl at this point. I know it's cliche, but I just want to focus on having a healthy baby. We will love him/her no matter what!

Oh, yes! I just celebrated my 24th birthday this past Sunday. It was a quiet night. We had dinner with the family, then C took me to the movies. We watched "Date Night" and were the only 2 out of 8 people in the theater laughing! I guess you have to have kids to appreciate it! But we both thought it was a great movie, and are totally buying it when it comes out!

That just about covers my month! Let's see if I can get on the ball and update more frequently! HAHAHA!

My little girl has found a new love for my high heel shoes! She has been wearing them constantly at home, whenever possible.

Last night, while I was making dinner, she came into the kitchen with my heels on, and grabbed her apron. She always wants to be like mommy, and since I was wearing MY apron, she had to wear hers. So, here she is, all decked out in her apron, and high heels!

I looked at her, giggled, and told Chris that she is practicing to be a little house wife! And the look on her face is classic Kayla! What a doll!

Well, it's been about 4 weeks since I wrote ANYTHING on here! I guess I need to be better about updating, but my life is pretty boring, LOL!

To start with, I am finally in the 2nd trimester! YAY! I am feeling MUCH better! My morning sickness has gone away, and I can finally eat again, which is very satisfying! The new symptoms have started kicking in though! My nose is stuffy, and I have to run to the bathroom every 30 minutes or so! On top of it, I have terrible allergies anyway, and allergy season is in full gear! So, I have been pretty miserable for about a week now.

As you can see, Kayla loves her baby brother or sister, and is very excited to be a BIG SISTER soon! Although, she changes her mind almost daily on whether she wants to bring home a brother, or a sister. She is very sweet, and kisses my belly regularly, and tells the baby that she loves it. It melts my heart every time!

I have finally started feeling our little one move. It isn't very strong yet, but it is definitely baby movements!

Wedding plans have slowed down a little bit. I am happy though, because we have some of the big, important stuff out of the way. We booked our venue, and photographer, picked our colors, bought the dress, and ordered our Save the dates (which I got for a steal!). We are getting our engagement pictures done this Saturday, as long as everything goes as planned! This is the 2nd time we have rescheduled, and I am getting pretty anxious about it! The first time was because the photographer had a family emergency, and today we rescheduled because my lovely town is a wind box! We had winds ranging from 18mph to 32mph... Not the best weather to get beautiful pictures in!

Today, we had our 16 week appointment. I am loving my doctor a little more each visit. We are very lucky, because he has an ultrasound in his office, and if time permits (which it has every appointment) he does a quick ultrasound to check out how baby is doing. Today was great, we went right in, and saw the baby. He/she is developing wonderfully. The first images we saw were of the beautiful little spine, and one of his/her arms, fully equipped with fingers and everything! Baby was napping while we were looking, and was facing away from us, but finally turned his/her little face toward us so we could get a nice picture. (The face is in the upper right corner of the picture above, the spine runs along the top, and the legs are curled up at the left). We are measuring right on track at 16 weeks 4 days, which puts the estimated due date at September 5th. I was also shocked to learn that I have only gained 2 pounds throughout this pregnancy! But, I was 5 pounds fatter than I originally thought :P

My doctor also relieved some of my fears for labor and delivery. I had a not so wonderful labor and delivery with Kayla, and my biggest fear is for it to happen again. I gave him a brief history about what happened, and he reassured me that if I got to that really uncomfortable point, he would make sure I was admitted, even if I wasn't at that "point" yet. This is what happened with Kayla... I went in two times within 5 hours and was sent home because I wasn't far enough dialated. The 2nd time, I really could have been admitted, but was sent home anyway because I hadn't reached 4 cm and my water hadn't broke. Within 2 hours of being sent home, my water broke and Kayla was ready to make her appearance! After being wheeled into the L&D wing in a wheel chair, I was told I had to wait my turn by the receptionist (although I was screaming "I have to push") and was finally wheeled back into a triage room to give birth. The delivery was pretty quick, but traumatic on me. Needless to say, I don't want to have a similar experience this time around. Dr. also gave us the option of scheduling an induction, so I know when it will happen, and we will be prepared. I don't really like that option, unless the baby was overdue by a week or so. But, at least I know he will work with me to make this labor and delivery a much better experience!

We also scheduled our next appointment for 4 weeks. I will officially be at the halfway mark, and we will be sent over to the hospital to have the BIG ultrasound. It is called the anatomy scan, but we are not finding out the sex. They will do a very detailed ultrasound, and measure everything that can be measured, and take LOTS of pictures!

After our appointment this afternoon, I sat there looking at the ultrasound picture and became overwhelmed with joy. I looked at Chris and said, "This mommy is so in love!" I can't wait 'til September to meet our little one, and hold him/her in my arms.

Okay, it's been a while since I posted last. I have had a hard 1st trimester. I had severe morning sickness, that got to the point that I couldn't eat. I was extremely exhausted, and slept most of my days off. No worries, my Dr. was great and gave me a prescription to help the morning sickness! I have felt much better for the last couple weeks, and I am now technically in my 2nd trimester.

The baby is doing great! This is the ultrasound from our 10 week appointment. Baby was moving like crazy, and had a very healthy heartbeat. There isn't much else to update on, since it is still too early to feel kicks, but we are still as excited as ever to be having this baby!

In other news, Chris and I have started planning our wedding. I actually found my wedding dress, and couldn't pass it up. I know it is early, and my body may change, but it can be altered, and I will have a great incentive to get my butt back into shape after the baby is born! My sister, and my bestie Kim were with me, and we had a great time trying on dresses! The girls were great, and made it a wonderful experience!

Tonight, we met with the photographer we want, Nickole Drake and booked her for the wedding. We have our engagement shoot scheduled for the 18th, and we are very excited to see the outcome of the pictures!

We picked our wedding colors, and are making our final decisions on the venue. Next on the list of to-dos, is researching DJ's and deciding on whether we are going to hire a DJ or a local band "Paid in Full" to play at the wedding. Once we get the major details settled, I will be less stressed out, and able to focus on the fun stuff. This next year is going to FLY by with the baby coming, planning the wedding, working, going to school, and raising Kayla. I can't wait to marry my best friend, and start the next chapter in our lives together!

Eloise comes to visit...

Chris' niece, Eloise and her Daddy, Phong came by this morning to visit. Martine (C's big Sis), Phong and Eloise are in town for the weekend to celebrate Debbie's birthday (Chris & Martine's mom). The girls went out of town to the spa, but I wasn't able to go. So, we got to visit with our favorite little girl, Eloise. I love this girl! She is so darn cute, and the sweetest thing!

Kayla and Eloise are playing together ever so nicely in Kayla's room, and Chris, Phong and myself are in there with them. Next thing I know, Phong is checking Eloise's diaper, and then this stink fills the room! What happens next? I am running to the bathroom, half laughing, and half gagging because of this girl's booty! I couldn't believe that her little poopy butt made me sick!

In other news, I am supposed to be at the peak of my morning sickness (that's what the experts say anyway)! I am hoping they are right because this week has been the worst so far. I am in a constant state of nausea, and nothing really seems to help (except for those unhealthy fries from McD's!) The other night, I made tacos, and about 15 minutes after we ate, I was feeling it! Even apples make me queasy! I am trying to be healthy, but this kid doesn't want any of it! My only hope is that once we hit the 2nd trimester, I can make up for the 1st!

Kayla is very excited to be a big sister, and she will be unless I pop out a little boy! This girl is dead set on having a baby sister! We have tried to explain to her that we don't get to decide, and we have to wait to see if it's a boy or girl. She sticks to her guns, though, and informs me time after time, that we will be having a girl! "What if it's a boy," I say, and she replies, "No, I want it to be a girl, I want a sister!" Boy, she could be very disappointed!

We're Engaged!!!!!

I'm the happiest girl, in the whole USA! Last week, Chris took me on a lovely trip to Flagstaff. We got there on Wednesday late afternoon, and were informed that there was a big storm coming in. I was in shock.... I am a desert rat... born and raised in a small town in the middle of the Mojave Desert. We have snowfall, maybe once every 5 or so years. The amount of snow that falls, is likely, less than 2 inches! So, here we are in beautiful Flagstaff, AZ surrounded by snow, and expecting a nice, big storm! Chris wasn't so worried. He lived there for 6 years while he was in college, and has dealt with this type of weather. So, he says, "No big deal, a little bit of snow can't scare me."

So, we hung out and went to Sadona that night, which was beautiful. Then we snuggled up in the hotel room for the rest of the night. It started to snow pretty hard around 10 PM, and from then on I was a nervous wreck. Thursday morning rolls around, and I am in Grumpsville! I woke up hormonal, and I didn't want to go ANYWHERE in that snow! Of course, Chris had his plan to take me to the Grand Canyon (I had never been), but I am REFUSING to go with him. Finally, he convinced me that it would be fine.

We got to the Grand Canyon around 3 PM, and were informed that we would not be able to actually see anything. Undeterred, we payed the dues, and drove up the the Angel Bright Lodge. We sat down for a nice lunch, the only table for about 20 minutes. We sat by the window, and watched the snow falling outside, and enjoyed the silence. After lunch, we decided to take a walk around the grounds. After a while, we came to a train stop that had a nice canopy over it, and took a rest before heading back. Chris slyly set up the video camera so he could be in the picture with me. Then he did it.... He proposed right there, at the Grand Canyon, in the snow! It was the most romantic thing I have ever had done for me. I cried, accepted, and gave him a big ol' kiss.

Besides nearly getting stuck for an extra day in Flagstaff, we had a wonderful trip. I will never forget my first trip to the Grand Canyon. Next time, I want to get to see the Canyon!!

Our first appointment

We had our first appointment today... Chris told me that he wants to be as involved as possible throughout this pregnancy, which means going to all appointments. He was right there by my side.

Doc did the routine stuff, I had a pap smear, and then he said he was going to do an U/S. I guess he though it would be comic relief when he said, "Hey, maybe it's twins!" What he didn't know was this was my biggest fear. My mom's parents are both twins. My Grandpa's mother was pregnant with 5 sets of twins, although only one set survived (my Grandpa and his twin). My Grandma is also a twin, but I don't know if her mother was pregnant with twins more than once or not. I got a look of terror on my face, and Doc continues on, "It's due, we get twins every 88 patients or so." I looked at Chris (who has been wishing for twins since BEFORE I got pregnant) and told him to shove it! Not that I wouldn't be thrilled to have 2 babies, but it scares the CRAP out of me!

So, we had a really quick ultrasound, pretty much to make sure the baby was inutero and there was a yolk sac. Everything looked fine, and there was definitely only ONE baby developing! The first thing out of my mouth once he got a clear picture was, "that's only one, right?" Doc laughed and said, "Yes, there is only one in there." Thank goodness! I don't know if I could handle a 4 year old and TWO babies!

My next appointment is in four weeks, and I am so excited! We will be able to see a real baby then. It may look like a little alien, but at least it will be resembling a human being!

Our BFP!!!!

Hi, my name is Amanda. I have a 3 year old daughter (4 in April), Kayla. She is the light of my life, and the laughter in my soul. My S.O. is Chris. We have been together for a little under 2 years (march 16 is our anniv.). Things were a bit complicated because my divorce took over a year and a half to get done, but it is over now, and C and I are on our way to a new life.

Marriage was the next item on our "To-Do" list. We have talked about it, and are even in the early stages of planning (talking about colors, venues, flowers etc.) but we are not officially engaged yet. We looked at rings about 2 months ago, to get an idea of what I want/like, and C has a plan on when he is going to pop the question. It is just a matter of waiting on my part!

Well, we had a wrench thrown into our plans right before the new year. I had been super cranky since the middle of December, and I just felt weird. So, a couple days before I was supposed to start my period I decided to take a test just to see. I have taken tests many times in the past (I am not on BC because every single one I have tried has given me a bad reaction, either yeast infections, upset stomach etc) thinking that I could be PG.

It was a day that I had to be to work at 11am, and I was running early, so I decided to run into Walgreens and buy a pack of tests. I got the E.P.T digital pack of 3, and headed off to work. I threw the bag into my purse, and went to work. I had this nagging feeling all morning, and I drank a lot of water so I had to pee. I decided to grab a test, and sneak away into the ladies room. I took the stick out and peed as much as I could (to my surprise I didn't pee very much, even though I drank a ton of water). I thought, "SH*T, this isn't going to work, that was barely 2 seconds worth of pee!" But I sat there anxiously anyway for the little hour glass to go away.... When it did, I was shocked to see "Pregnant" in the window.

I was so giddy, that I couldn't wipe the smile off my face. I forced myself to calm down and get back to work. I proceeded to take a picture of the dipstick with my phone, and sent a text to my lovely bf Chris. He was delighted, but skeptical. I wanted to tell the world at this point, but decided it was better to wait. But, the one person I HAD to tell was my mom. I asked C if I could, and he told me to take another test, and if the result was the same, then tell. So, I went to my mom's to say hi, and I snuck into her bathroom and took another test. I was disappointed to see the "not pregnant" this time, but decided that it was just a sign not to tell yet.

The next morning, I flew out of bed and went into the bathroom where the third test was sitting on the counter waiting for me, and tested one more time.... Again, I read "pregnant" on the window! It was true, I am pregnant! So, C and I were filled with excitement, and worry, and joy all at the same time, and we decided we would wait until I actually missed my period to tell our family. A couple days later, the time came to tell... We went to my mom's and told her first. She was caught off guard, but is happy to be a Grandma-to-be again. That night, Chris' mom and sisters came to our place to have a game night, and we told them.... I didn't get the reaction I was expecting, but after the shock wore down, they all told us they were happy and very excited. Then, we told C's dad, and grandparents. Again, they were all very excited and happy for us.

Our first prenatal appointment is next Thursday the 14th, and we are planning on telling the rest of our family and friends once we get confirmation that the baby is healthy, and everything is ok.